“I’m shocked
Can’t believe this is happening
“For the past 8yrs of childlessness, it’s been h3ll for me in my marriage. Everyday I’m being blamed for being unable to get pregnant & it has become a regular song for my in-laws to sing to me, including my own husband whom never defends me but instead, he takes side, teaming  up with his family to in_sult & call me barën,

I live in s_hame in my neighborhood due to the constant harassments i get from my husband whom, is always ontop of his voice when scolding or in_sult!ng me, scr3am!ng at me for no good reason calling me ‘ s_hameless b_@rren w_t3h. He always does this anytime he wants, not minding if the neighbors are watching or getting his voice. Sometimes,  i can even hear my neighbors, whispering & laughing at the insult he trows at me. This has made me feel so low of myself

i no longer have self-esteem & i do not feel comfortable going to gatherings or crowded places such as the market, church etc.. I prefer finishing my house chores, stay indoors & sleep all day. I’ve been doing this for the past 4 years now bcoz that’s when the situation got even w0rse & its been easy for me to hide myself from people, since my husband do not want me to get a job..

But something happened 2 days ago. As usual i was cleaning the house but this time, i decided to empty the whole cupboard, I took out some trash & stuffs that were no longer in use so i could burnt. But then, i came across, a certain medical report showing that my husband once had an accident 24yrs ago, which rendering him incapable of impregnating any woman. He was 16 that time. When i confronted him he apologized & now, he is begging me to stay & not tell anyone about it & has promised to change for better towards me. He even, added that his family know about his condition.

Am so sh-ocked & in tëars as i type this. For 8 good yrs. I’ve been d!s,gr@ced, emotionally t0rturéd, b_lamed & called b@rën by my husband & his family, meanwhile they all knew that I’m innocent & ignorant Right now, i do not even know what to believe, anymore, I’m so confused & do not know, if i should quit or stay in this marriage. It’s been 8yrs gone. I’m 33yrs old already where do i start from, which man is going to want to marry me at this age after 30! “

Pic unrelated
#AnnonymousPost
(A rëpost from this page)

Immediately i stepped my feet in my NYSC Orientation camp, i observed that i lost some of my civic rights. I can’t wear any other clothes apart from the one recommended by the camp, i can’t leave the environment until 21 days elapses. You will only eat during meal time if you miss out you wait for the next meal.

I asked myself why did i enter this camp at the first place? But i observed that all these were for a purpose.

I asked myself again why are soldiers our trainers? I found out that they want to inculcate in us the mindset of a soldier. You know we learn mostly by observing. I began to observe the Soldiers in the camp. I found out that on the day we were sworn in as corps members, having passed through strenuous exercises, parades and drills, a welcome party was thrown were everyone was allowed to dance.

I observed virtually all the corps members and camp directors danced, but none of the soldiers danced. It popped some questions in my heart. Are they not human beings? Yes they are. Don’t they have flesh. They have. Honestly i developed interest on them.

I concluded that that soldiers don’t entangle themselves with civilian affairs. They focus on their Duty and Mission. A soldier’s primary responsibility is to serve their country by fulfilling military duties, which often requires complete focus on missions, training, and readiness. Involving themselves in civilian matters could distract them from their military obligations.

A soldier functions under a strict hierarchy and code of conduct. Soldiers are expected to remain disciplined and professional, which includes refraining from political or civilian involvement that could interfere with their duties or create conflicts of interest..

Soldiers need to be ready to deploy or respond to national emergencies at any time. If they are tied up in civilian matters, it may hinder their ability to fulfill their military commitments swiftly and effectively.

Now i want to speak to you as a child of God that you are a soldier of Christ. You are not meant to entangle yourself with civilian affairs which include every form of distraction in obeying the command of your commanding officer (Jesus Christ.) The church is called the Saint Militant. We are to earnestly contend for the faith which was handed over to us by our fathers. Defend the gospel and proclaim the gospel to the world.

There should be a clear distinction between a soldier and a civilian. My question to you as a believer is, ARE YOU A SOLDIER? If you are, let your lifestyle show it.

Bro Chiedozie Ubani

Each time that she’s maltreating my child, she asks me not to intervene leaving me feeling guilty & ineffective as a parent. Deep down, I know I’m not being a good father to my 4yr old daughter, but I’m so helpless. I’m so deeply in love with my new wife.

She understands & cares for me like no one els, if I’m to be honest, she’s sweet & does things for me that no woman, even my late wife, has ever done. Actually, the fault isn’t mine but that of my late wife’s family. Despite my pleads to take my daughter they refuse insisting she needs her fathers love & attention. I’m an only child of my parents, i only have my mom left & i cant stress her with the responsibility of taking my child cuz of her age.

On several occasions, I’ve pleaded with my late wife’s family repeatedly to take my daughter offering financial support & even promising to send money for her upkeep & needs. But they insist on her staying with me. Now, my wife demands I chose between her & my daughter saying she can’t accommodate her anymore. I’ve tried begging my wife, but she insists I get rid of her.

Pls, What can I do about this? I’m confused & honestly do not know if I’m ready to let my new wife whom loves & understands me so well go bcoz of my daughter as I also do have my own life to live, I’m a 48 year old lonely young man who also deserves a sweet & good love life, but Now I’m trapped between love & fatherhood.”

Nb; Picture unrelated
#Fatherhood
#marriagecounseling